75 & still Flipping! : )

What do you do 3 days after your 75th birthday ......




FLIPS in the pool, of course.




Today, I was inspired to live life to the fullest.
That's my daddy, and I love him so. : )

Green Tea & Thanks on Sat(her)day

A couple of weeks ago a friend in Atlanta told me about a new green tea. Knowing this friend like I do ... if she says its good, its good. So I made a mental note of the brand and told her I would look for it in our (one and only) local "healthy" food store. Yesterday, while shopping in my regular "not so healthy" grocery store, I spotted it. A most unlikely sight, but there it was .... way up on the top shelf. I climbed up there, and scored!

I rushed home, quickly put away my groceries (leaving the "prize" out on the counter so I would not forget it), and was off to my next appointment. Whoosh, whoosh, whoosh.

It was late and I was exhausted when I finally got home (you'd think I would know the pattern by now - the pattern of "unexpected" when my hubby is away at the annual men's retreat) my "tea" was a welcome reminder of the promise of normalcy to come ...

Morning came, and my friend was right! This may very well be the MOST incredible tea on the face of the earth. Of course, the stillness of the moment may have contributed a bit to my sipping pleasure. Maybe I should have another cup before I proclaim it - best in the world. : )

Funny thing about being still, things come into focus. As I sat and reflected on the past couple of days, I was able to see past the unexpected chaos and remember the joy of the celebration that had occured just over 24 hours ago ... What a privilege it was to gather together as a family and honor my daddy on his 75th birthday!

That's when my tea time turned to Thanksgiving.

Thankful for good times, and laughter.

Thankful God picked him to be my daddy.

Thankful for his devotion to my momma for over 50 years of marriage.

Thankful for the twinkle (he still has) in his eye when he looks at her.

Thankful for his loving sacrifice over the years as a provider, and as a loving father of his 6 daughters. Poor daddy, even our family dogs were usually female. :)

My Sat(her)day "tea time of thanksgiving" is dedicated to my daddy.

With love, from his little girl.

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Sat(her)day may be done on any day (that works well for you) of the week. It is meant to be an encouragement and a reminder to women in leadership to plan time for themselves at least once a week. My Saturday blog has proven to be an effective means of holding myself accountable. I hope it inspires you to the same accountability. : )

Sometimes the best option to regain balance is to delegate, delegate, delegate ...

Look at your list (see yesterday's post), and be honest. Are the things on the "only I can do" side of your list TRULY things ONLY you can do? Or are you simply unwilling to relinquish control of them? A wise "keeper" of the home knows when it is necessary to delegate, delegate, delegate.

Once you have identified the household things which can be delegated, you will need to identify the recipient of the delegated tasks. : )

If married, begin with discussing options available to your family with your husband. Together, choose the option which best fits your budget, season of life, etc.

For couples who both work full-time outside the home, you could possibly share the household responsibilities. For example, if one cooks, the other cleans up the dishes. If one vacuums, the other dusts. If one does the laundry, the other cleans the bathrooms, etc.

For households with children, you could possibly delegate a specific household responsibility to each child according to age & maturity level.

Another option is to hire a professional. If you are pretty good at keeping up with the daily cleaning, but never find time to do the "heavy" cleaning - perhaps a monthly visit from a cleaning angel would be just the ticket to get you back in balance. If you struggle just keeping the family fed, and in clean clothes ... perhaps a weekly visit from a cleaning angel is more in order. : )

Once you identify the areas which need to be delegated, and to whom you will begin delegating them, keep in mind the following:

• Be flexible. No one will clean your home exactly the way you clean your home.
• Be forgiving. Things occasionally will be broken whether you are cleaning, your teenager is cleaning, or a paid professional is cleaning.
• Be a good manager. Clear (and realistic) expectations are the best way to lead.
• Be appreciative. Remember this person's help is freeing you up to do other things God has called you to do. BE APPRECIATIVE. An appreciated helper is a happy helper, and an appreciative manager is a happy manager.

Help, my house is Out of Control!

Today, we are turning our focus to regaining balance in "keeping" house. If you're out of balance, obviously what you're currently doing is NOT working. So let's begin with a new plan of action. Being "keeper" of the house DOES NOT mean you MUST do all the work yourself. This can be liberating to a woman who thinks she MUST do everything. Many times, we're out of balance as a result of our attempt to do TOO MUCH.

For example, if you are working outside the home, are home-schooling your children, or have a house FULL of children ... you may need to give yourself permission to get some help.

As "keeper" of the house, we must have wisdom in determining what only we can do and what we can enlist the help of others to do. You must determine what is the best fit for you (and your family) during this season of life.

Give this some thought and then ... make a list.

There should be two columns. The left column should read "Things ONLY I can do" and the right column should read "Things I can DELEGATE & oversee"

When you have made your list, review the things you listed on the "ONLY I can do" side. Are these really things ONLY you can do, or are you just unwilling to delegate these things?

Join me tomorrow for more. : )

Sat(her)day - Morning Coffee Talk!

When my head finally hit the pillow last night I knew it would require true-grit determination to drag my buttocks out of bed this morning, and it did. After hitting snooze three times, I showered, dressed, and kissed the sleeping fam goodbye. Then I was off for my Sat(her)day morning coffee talk with the girls.

The absence of people on the road was a stark reminder that the majority of population was still enjoying a Saturday morning sleep in. My mind drifted back to my nice warm bed. : )

After parking my car (right up front!) I walked through the doors of Panera and was greeted by the most wonderful aroma ever .... freshly baked bread, pastries, and an assortment of other breakfast items. Oh yeah, this was worth getting up for! I took a glance around the restaurant and spotted our hostess. The woman who had been responsible for planning this Saturday morning coffee talk. I ran over for a quick hello and hug, then walked back toward the wonderful aroma to get my breakfast ... : )

Decisions, decisions, decisions. I blurted out, with great enthusiasm, I'll have a bagel! My decision may have startled the young man behind the counter just a bit but .... to a woman who has been eating just enough calories to keep her alive and working out like a mad-woman for 3 weeks, a bagel is a pretty BIG deal! : )

And so is some much needed "girl" time. One by one, our group assembled. We sat, talked, laughed, and ate "treats" together. And it was good.

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When is the last time you got together with the girls?

Is it worth giving up an hour of sleep on a Saturday morning?

Work it into your schedule, you won't regret it. : )

10 Ways to Nurture Oneness back into your Marriage

This list is by no means exhaustive. The first 5 suggestions are meant to simply reset your pattern of behavior. The next 5 are meant to get you thinking. The possibilities are endless... : )

1. GIVE YOURSELF PERMISSION TO NURTURE YOUR MARRIAGE! If you did not grow up with this example of marriage, you may need to ignore the voices in your head telling you it is selfish, or that a good marriage shouldn't need to be nourished. It's not selfish, and a good marriage definitely does need to be nurtured. And as for the kids, giving them this example of marriage is one of the most loving, and necessary gifts we can give. They may cry a bit now (especially if they are old enough to notice this is NEW behavior for mom and dad) but will thank you later.
2. PLAN IT! Get with your hubby and discuss the plan. And then get it on the calendar. Yours, his, and the family calendar!
3. GUARD IT! There will be times it will be necessary to change plans but ... define necessary. It is easier to define necessary before the "drama" strikes. Define necessary, and stick to it. : )
4. ANTICIPATE IT! Write your hubby a love note and leave it in an unexpected place (on the bathroom mirror, in his briefcase, in his lunchbox) telling him how much you are looking forward to your date. And (or) call him when you know he will be unable to answer his phone ... leave him a message telling him how much you are looking forward to spending alone time with him.
5. MEET ALONE! Be creative ... if your schedules are really out of balance it may be necessary to start with simply meeting for coffee, breakfast, lunch.
6. MAKE IT REGULAR! Commit to making this a regular occurence. Get out your planners and schedule it. Meet regularly (ALONE) for coffee, breakfast, lunch. Weekly is ideal, but bi-weekly is probably more realistic goal. Monthly is not regular. : )
7. DREAM TOGETHER! When was the last time you and your guy shared your heart, your dreams, and your passions with one another? Take a walk. Hold hands. Share your dreams.
8. PRAY TOGETHER! Nothing connects our hearts more than praying together with our spouse. This may seem ackward at first but ... hang in there. Pray with your hubby and see what happens. : )
9. PLAY TOGETHER! Remember the days when you were dating and no matter what you were doing it was fun, just because you were together? May I suggest that is because when we were dating we were more likely to be found "playing" together. Find something you both enjoy, and do it together. Something you can do (not as mom and dad) but as husband and wife, as a couple, just for fun ... PLAY TOGETHER.
10. GET AWAY TOGETHER! When was the last time you had a trip with your man? If you said your honeymoon - you need to plan this IMMEDIATELY! Whether it is one night, one weekend, or one week. The reward is sweet. Do not underestimate the reward in getting away together.

I hope you have been inspired by some of the above suggestions. If you are not doing any of the above already, do not be overwhelmed. Simply take one of the suggestions and begin to implement it today. Then add another, and another ... Take it one day at a time and enjoy the journey of rediscovering the beauty of ONEness when 1+1=1.

Balance Anyone? A Marriage 911

We have already established (in previous posts) it is NOT wise to continue just simply "turning up" the intensity of the area most in need of nourishment but... there are times when it is VITAL! Today, we will turn our focus to "those" times.

Let's begin with marriage. If you find yourself feeling more like a roommate than a wife these days, you have (most likely) been neglecting to guard the time necessary to nourish your marriage.

Ask yourself why?

Before you simply dismiss this by saying you are too busy, or he's too busy, or the kids have you both too busy ... Ask yourself (and BE HONEST) how intentional have you been in planning alone time with your hubby?

Time with your man is how you got to know him, how you grew closer to him, and how you came to love him while you were dating. And time with your man is how you will continue to know him, how you will continue to grow closer to him, and how you will be reminded why you married him.

If you have not been intentional in planning (by now) you know ... these times don't just happen. They didn't just happen when you were dating and they will not just happen now that you are married. You may share the same house, the same bed, the same kids, and the same dog but ... without time alone the oneness you crave will end up looking like two peeps going in different directions while sharing a house, a mortage, some kids, and a dog.

That's when we start feeling like a roommate instead of a wife.

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If you are there, or know someone who is, join me tomorrow for 10 ways to nourish oneness back into your marriage. : )